Spewage Of The Brain

I literally did nothing all weekend even though I was sans spawn. Just wasn’t feeling it. More like a crushing inexplicable cloud of blackness was crushing me to the point I couldn’t breathe, let alone feel.

Do I give off a suicidal vibe with my spewage? Because hearing someone call me suicidal really hit me as being….wrong. I don’t obsess about death, I don’t fear it, I don’t cut, I don’t talk about harming myself…How on Earth could anyone take my posts as suicidal?

But then, that’s what it boils down to, ain’t it. Individual perception. We all see what we want to see, hear what we want to hear. And if your brain is altered by bipolar or depression half of what you perceive is suspect to begin with. I’ve said nothing in this blog I haven’t repeated to my psychiatrist, so if I truly were suicidal, I think he’d have picked up on it. I’m the girl with no filter on her brain, after all. I think it, I usually say it.

Bringing me to another point thrown at me. Though not partial to putting weight into the ramblings of people under the influence of drugs, alcohol, or snorted sea monkeys but…It was just one of those things, like the suicidal perception of me, that hit a nerve.

“Lots of people on line are hating on you.”


I sit in my corner of the interwerbs and bother no one. No one is forced to read this spewage by some sort of spork sorcery.

“But, Morgue, you’re such a rebel, what with your black clothes and foul language, why would you care what anyone thinks????”

Perhaps this is where my weirdness truly shines through….I DON’T GIVE A FUCK WHAT PEOPLE THINK OF ME.

I do, however, feel entitled to know what I have done to earn the hatred. If it’s something I can validate, like saying “Wednesday 13 could totally take God in an arm wrestling match”…fine. My humor can offend.

If I am hated because I use the word “fuck” a lot or am kidcentric or redundant…Puh-leeze, that’s petty bullshit. If you’re bothered by that fluff, I don’t want you reading my blog cos you obviously don’t get it.

So- hate me with valid cause, excellent, we are good.

Hate me for no valid reason and I WILL perform spork sorcery on your ass.

Just kidding. I am far too apathetic and lazy to be bothered.

In trying to connect all the dots to this seemingly neurotic “Oh, people don’t like her and she’s boo hooing about it” post…The thing is, I watched a movie called “Devil’s Knot” yesterday, based on the “West Memphis Three” case. If you’re unfamiliar, three 8 year old boys were murdered in this backwoods Arkansas town and true to small towns and small minds…

They pinned it on three local kids, “misfits”,  one of whom was mentally retarded, one whose biggest crime was being a gifted artist who liked to draw skulls and such, and one who wore black, was a smartass, had been involved with Wicca and oh THE TIE THAT BANDS ALL EVIL TOGETHER….

They listened to that dagburn satan music called heavy metal which is the gateway to murder.

Now, the movie wasn’t funny, there is nothing funny about three children dying, and three teenagers who are innocent being imprisoned for the crimes…But every time they started in with their southern preaching about the devil and occult and wearing black and heavy metal…I laughed. I really, truly, did laugh out loud.

Thank the sacred pegacorn ignorance isn’t contagious. But, wait…it kind of is.

Those teenage boys were convicted based on hearsay, out and out lies, the police coercing “witnesses” and the “satan” mind set. Prior to the murders, those boys hadn’t been more than a blip of “teenage weirdness”. But because it is so much easier to make anyone different into a monster rather than face the fact that most monsters look exactly like your preacher next door or that nice lady at the post office…They put it on the outcasts. And in their small minded panic, no one gave a damn about facts, evidence, contradictions in testimonies…

The law ceased to exist. The misfits were different therefore guilty.

18 Years in prison before they eventually reached an “Alford” plea just so they could get out. The state never admitted any wrong doing. The locals remained convinced the boys did it.

Because they wore black, drew skulls, and listened to heavy metal, for the most part.

So maybe I am too sensitive to being judged on the fluff inane shit.

See, I was the teenage girl wearing all black, listening to Ozzy Osbourne, and suddenly, I too, became a satan worshiper. No one cared that I lived in the boondocks, too young to drive, home every night taking care of my sister while my parents worked…I was a whoring satan worshiping skank.

Perhaps this is why I am so unfiltered and truth bound. Because it takes zero intelligence to tow the party line, to repeat what is heard rather than proven, because it is just easier to see a person who lives in a trailer park and has holes in their clothes and say, “Oh, what a sleazeball” than to really use your brain and realize…That nice looking young man next door is the next Ted Bundy. But he LOOKS so normal.

So, yeah.

Love me, hate me, love and hate me. Just have a damned good reason all around.

Because if going back on Lithium helps sort out my brain sewage…I just might find the energy to look into that spork sorcery thing.

Only those with a good reason for hating me will be exempt from the spell turning everyone into  human centipedes.


not the least bit suicidal or homicidal, just snarky lil me…


28 Responses to “Spewage Of The Brain”

  1. I never have gotten the suicide vibe from you. But, maybe that’s because I know first hand what that looks/feels like and I can see that’s not where you are. Just because things are hard doesn’t make us suicidal. If anything, your love and trying for Spook is the proof anyone should need to know you aren’t suicidal.

    Damn people can be so fucking stupid.

  2. Hey Sissy ~ Aah luvvz youuu! ❤ You're right ~ FUCK EM! That movie sounds sooo familiar. I saw Robin Hood Hills Murder maybe a decade ago,,,hmmm very similar,,, I've heard two sayings before (not a total of 2 in my LIFE LOL!?)
    A) what others think of you is none of your business. 114) Our reality is totally what WE perceive. **Asshole haters, throw em my way, I'll give em something to hate!!

  3. Before I read beyond the first two paragraphs
    Anyone regarding your work as suicidal, point them to my stuff as a laugh!

  4. You as ever have the gift to offend, challenge and make folks cower as the sacred spork to rule them all is produced, a gift indeed
    But before becoming a world threatening sorceress of spork darkness know this, there are folks like me who smile upon reading your work
    Folks immune to your powers are more likely to not care however, so we’re really not a threat to the world taking over plans
    My sanity is about to give out again so i’m going to don the straight jacket and howl at the moon to scare the doctors

    • Barking or howling at the moon is sooo 1980’s, The Ozzy Years. Now if you want to get a rise out of the doctors, you have to wear a tin foil trench coat while wailing at banshee pegacorns.

      I sooo wanna make the tin foil trench coat a fashion statement.

      On Mon, Jan 4, 2016 at 5:11 PM, Take a Ride on My Mood Swing wrote:


      • Don’t forget to tell them how the pegacorn of doom is telling you your neighbours are plotting to dethrone you, adds an extra layer of restraints and head shrinking to the stay at the nice clean white padded motel

      • Yeah, that whole white thing is a trigger for me so I am lobbying for black straight jackets and black padded rooms. If it slims the body, maybe it will slim my insanity 😉

        On Mon, Jan 4, 2016 at 5:42 PM, Take a Ride on My Mood Swing wrote:


      • Going at that angle, vertical stripes

      • Stripes??? Nooooo! I can do small polka dots in neutrals but stripes cause people to mistake me with a circus tent! I can’t chance being locked up with a dude who used to be a clown and thinks my pants are the big top he lives in….

      • ^^ beetlejuice beetlejuice beetlejuice! LOL! <3. ;-*

      • My neighbors are too busy making meth to dethrone me as long as I am not competition.
        I wish I were being dramatic but the seven cop cars outside the other day tell me otherwise.

      • Sure they weren’t just at the wrong address you give people!

      • Too funny…I’d more likely be running a bordello or S and M den, though I can’t fathom how what with my kid glued to me every waking and sleeping moment.
        Besides…this trailer park is the meth manufacturing capital of this town, sad to say.
        I still like living here cos I get my cats and the landlord has never once “inspected” thus breaking the safe seal of my bubble.
        That’s worth a thousand meth dealers as neighbors.

  5. Never get the “suicidal vibe” from your posts, other than life is shit in your small town and your brain won’t cooperate do you can society. Fuck the idgets and douchebags. I remember that movie/documentary. So horrible three teenaged boys lost 18 years of their lives to ignorance and Bible thumping assfuckery. A damn fucking shame.
    Keep it coming, Snarkasma

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