PSA #2 for Mental Health Bloggers/Twitter Users/Facebook Users

I woke up this morning to find a post by one of my all time favorite bloggers, and someone I consider a friend, and she was upset by all of the sunshine spewing that has become part of the “positive bipolar” movement. I share her feelings. She’s so rattled, she no longer finds blogging a healthy experience and is considering abandoning her blog and wordpress.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Given, my thoughts on social media like Twitter and Facebook are akin to how I view child molesters so I don’t participate or link thus inviting such idiocy…But HOW DARE PEOPLE BE SO FUCKING CRUEL AND RUDE TO ANYONE! The comments made to her about her blog and thus her feelings make me ashamed to be part of the same human race. The “well meaning” people are bad, but some of the cruel insults are reticent of bullies in school.

GROWN PEOPLE BEING BULLIES. IN THE MENTAL HEALTH CATEGORY. WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK?????

Internet trolls are just stupid. They are the bullies from school who just became adult bullies, and to an extent, you consider the source and just give an eye roll. Thank pegacorns stupid isn’t contagious.

But the mental health bloggers, bipolar in particular, who have left her comments on how she’s too negative, can’t be bipolar because she’s too angry, she discusses suicide which glamorizes it, et al…

I find those people repugnant. No one forces you to leave a comment. No one forces you to read it. If that style of writing isn’t your cup of tea, be an adult and move along. GROW THE FUCK UP. This “positive bipolar” movement is like the fucking Borg. YOU WILL BE ASSIMILATED, RESISTANCE IS FUTILE.

Ya know what? I cringe every time I read some vapid research fact laden post with statistics and inspirational quotes out the wazoo. I want to reach through the computer screen and slap a bitch with a rotting fish. They make my blood boil with their “bipolar isn’t so bad, it’s all about attitude and embracing God.” Oh, fuck off. I don’t bother you with my “pessimism”, so show some respect and keep your sunshine spewage to yourself. It’s what adults do. Agree to disagree without resorting to childhood bullying behavior. Even if you think you are “helping” by encouraging someone to be more positive…The road to hell was paved with good intentions. Having these beliefs shoved down my throat are unhealthy, it just leads to me feeling worse because once again, I can’t be what I am expected to be by “polite society.” And I am not alone in this, lots of us find that method counter productive, just as many find the dark gritty side of mental illness too much to handle and unhealthy for their mental state.

You are entitled to your thoughts and beliefs, same as all of us. But to leave such nasty comments simplyΒ  because someone won’t assimilate to your shiny happy denial side of the fence is reprehensible.

I don’t leave comments on blogs I don’t find interesting. Or on topics that anger me. Or just because I am in a depression and find happy people a trigger that makes me want to become a human nail gun and spit railroad spikes.Β  I don’t leave comments and dispute a diagnosis simply because their writing doesn’t reflect what I, personally, experience with my disorder. Invalidating the feelings of others is mean.

Now you may wonder why I am even sounding off on this as it doesn’t affect me. My experiences with wordpress and the mental health category have been incredibly positive. Like 99.8 % positive. So how is her blog my business?

Because, I, like many of our mutual blogger friends, really enjoy her writing and how she puts things into her own words, sets her own tone. We call her a friend and we don’t want her to quit blogging. We don’t want her to go away because a bunch of grown up bullies can’t keep their grubby fingers off the commentΒ  button which BTW, is NOT mandatory and does not translate into OMG THIS PERSON DOESN’T HAVE THE SAME OPINION AS ME, THEY ARE WRONG, I MUST TELL THEM SO!

It makes me sadder than I can say that this friend I treasure has had her wordpress experience become one more negative in her life. For many of us, it’s cathartic and healthy. That anyone would rob her of that should make us all angry. It doesn’t matter if it’s your business, or if it affects you personally. You stand up for your friends when they are under attack. You defend them. You rail against those who hurt them. You speak up and speak out in the hopes that even just ONE small mind will open up to the possibility that even though they meant well…Maybe they were wrong to say what they did, maybe their good intentions caused harm to another.

This isn’t about someone being “too sensitive” or “too easily offended”. This is about someone pouring their innermost feelings out only to have them invalidated, assaulted, and told to basically change who they are and how they feel just for the comfort of others. It’s really simple. If it brings you down, don’t read it.

And for the love of pegacorns, don’t click that comment button. Sometimes, moms are right. If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all. And if you do have something nice to say…THINK AGAIN. Because if you think telling someone whose condition isn’t under control that “you don’t meet the criteria for bipolar, you just need to be more positive” is helpful…

Maybe you’re not so positive. Maybe you’re just delusional.

I won’t be leaving you a comment to tell you so, though, because I’m an adult who can disagree with you yet show enough maturity and respect to not turn it into an assault on your feelings and identity.

 

 

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64 Responses to “PSA #2 for Mental Health Bloggers/Twitter Users/Facebook Users”

  1. As you more likely know, I totally agree with you!! Fuckin’ ASSFUCKS!

  2. Jesu swept (intentional typo, extra emphatic), I just. Ugh. One reason I asked you way early to join the Bipolar Blogger Network is because I adore that you’re just about as honest as they come. That you’re sharing your experience, even if it’s not fluffy. Shit, sometimes I worry that I’m too sunshine spewy because my experiences are neutral to positive for the most part, but like… *waves hands* Shit.

    • There, dropped a comment on hers too. I just. Rude.

      • I really don’t begrudge people their happy cheerfulness. It’s just not healthy for me when I am on a cycle in the abyss. If that’s the case, I read, I click like if I liked it, and move along. I just don’t get why people feel the need to leave rude comments rather than just agree to disagree and go on their merry. We’re supposed to be a community, bonded by mutual experiences, positive and negative. Support should not waver just because one person’s in a good place and another is not. Makes me very sad.

        On Sun, Jul 26, 2015 at 1:34 PM, Take a Ride on My Mood Swing wrote:

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      • Agreed. It seems to be a common worry amongst many of the Bipolaratti, feeling like they have to be ‘positive’ when um. Yeah naw, that’s just not how it goes all the time.

  3. Hell fucking yeah LOVE this side of you! It’s not fucking right what they have done to our friend. It’s utter bullshit and idiocy that abounds and astounds. I love that the few of us that are so close can gather together and encourage without rainbow farting pegacorns puking puppies and kittens. We get on the grit of it, hold their hands and fight right along side. And the fact these are “adults”..fuck they all want shiny, not real.

    • I’m scared to check my email cause when I glanced today I saw some spam. I swear I get anxiety every time I open my email. Btw. I love you. We all need to hang out one day and drink. Lots. I’ll be out after one glass or two but I want to have a drink with all of you.

      • I get anxiety checking email, snail mail, voice mail…It’s logical because we don’t know what is gonna hit us in the face when we may not be in the shape to handle it.

        Oh, yes, Diane and I have already planned the Volatile Femmes tour to some foreign country where we are gonna be pirates and drink before noon! Just remember…she who passes out first probably wakes up covered in Sass’s pink glitter craft project πŸ˜‰ Love ya!

      • You have a SHIT TON of support! Don’t let those idiots take away your courage to keep spewing your truth πŸ˜‰ ok so we know Morgue like cake vodka and you like wine, Tessa drinks water-not sure what Kitt or Diane drink, or E. You know me-HIGH DOLLAR SCOTCH! I’m not a cheap drunk lol πŸ˜‰ We love you! Now who wants to plan a trip to Florida?!

      • I wanna go just to see this clinic where she gets her “treatment” and put that shit on Dateline or something. I get being broke and all, but it sounds third world. We can promote Volatile Femmes merchandise during the commercials…”Are you feeling angry today? Did a MAN piss you off? Have we got a cure for you! Introducing, the MANATA…Free barbed wire dildo included for stabbing…”
        I ain’t right but it’s fun.

      • I know..she’s had such HORRID treatment through that place. And the worst part is we are a “developed country” (pffffbt) and we treat our own worse than animals. Disgusting. Who cares if it ain’t right?! We need the fun. I am feeling a little stabby today. Stupid mania…

      • Well, hey, my idiot shrink may have gotten something right with his claims that the anger and irritability are all part of the hypomania. My others docs explained it only as productive happy energy so the anger was always knocking me for a loop.
        Stabbing is fun. I think I will have “stab the tail on the net troll” as a game for Spook’s birthday πŸ˜€

      • Yeah mine said that too-but since I’ve been on the klonopin I don’t have that. Weird. Anger fuels a lot-made me super productive sometimes. Weirder.
        BWAHAHAHA I WANNA PLAY!! πŸ˜€ I wish you guys could come to Monkey’s party-she’s having a surprise skate party!

      • Last time I went skating was for a school event with R’s kids fifteen years ago. The brats knocked me down and laughed at me.
        I used to skate when I was kid and I was good at it, so I don’t get what happened to my ability. It’s MIA. Still…I’d give it a whirl.
        Spook’s going to Chuck E Cheese. My mom went and got a payday loan to afford it. Idiot. I hope there’s Ski-Ball or I am gonna pout. No game for me to play and I am stuck at the adult table. Icky.

      • Ugh those little fuckers. I’m not very good on my feet in flip flops, so skates are out for me! I’ll sit at the kiddie table with my flask and watch πŸ˜‰
        Omg she IS an idiot. I LURVE Ski-Ball-accept when some little punk ass unsupervised 4 year old comes over and steals my ball. You bet I’ll throw down over that shit. Oh gawd, you’ll need a salt lick of Xanax…or an IV drip. Yeah there ya go!

      • I’m not worried about the brats. I can handle a hundred of them over one of my mother!

      • Oy vey that’s bad!

      • Ha, she should be Jewish, she’s a fucking travel agent for guilt trips!

      • Florida sounds great. I have been known to imbibe a little now and then. Last wedding had a least 4 Bahama bay breezes I think they were called.

      • Woo hoo! Those sound yummy! Let’s all meet here in Indy, then go to Florida! Are we going to fly or drive??!

      • I nominate you ‘cos I’m too panic stricken to drive in any place larger than 25.000. We’re gonna need to sell a LOT of merchandise to afford airfare.
        And alcohol. Yes, we will need lots of money for that, just to afford your fancy hooch! Mwuuuuh. ❀

      • Woohoo! BEEP BEEP BITCHES! And no one can complain about my driving. Shit, guess I’ll have to sell myself on the way down just for MY booze! Oh well, I’ll make it fun!

  4. I am sorry to hear what happened to Zoe. I admired her telling it like it is. It sometimes doesn’t relate to me, but I would never leave a rude comment on anyone’s blog. Hell I hardly use the “F” word. It just isn’t me, but if I do you know I am mad as hell. I am so sorry we are losing Zoe. Will miss her. I know I tend to spew rainbows at times, but I am doing it for me. I would never force it on another. If it isn’t your thing, pass over it. No problem.

    • Some of it is just how each of us approach things as individuals. If spewing the bad helps some of us as much as focusing on the good helps others…What’s the harm and why on Earth would anyone be so rude based on differing opinions?
      I don’t mind the sunshine spewing from you, you’re in a good place and I am happy for you. Besides…When you do get mad and go off on insurance companies and such…It’s downright entertaining!

      • I am glad you find my going off on people entertaining. I am also glad you are not mad about my spewing rainbow shit. I want to try and help and help myself. I am not positive when I am not stabilized. I have had a couple of rants in here. I am not perfect, but being in a good place is so not me that I hate the thought of losing it. ❀

  5. Misery loves company ~ these MOTHERFUCKERS are miserable ASSFUCKS that wanna portray to the public that they’re in control of their disease/disorder, whatever the fuck ‘they have’. THE FACT THAT SOME OF US DON’T PAINT A BULLSHIT SUNNY PICTURE OF OUR DAILY ORDEALS MUST MAKE THEM BUTT HURT!! ASSHOLES! DON’T LIKE IT, GO AWAY!! Don’t linger & troll!!

    • And you win the award for the most usage of the word “fuck” in a single comment. Damnfuckitall, you stole my award, woman!

      • Aww,, FUCK! I’m, how can I say this? I’m FUCKING HONORED! Don’t worry though, I’m not stingey, I’ll share that Mother Fucker with you! After all, you’re my friend! πŸ™‚

      • TEN fucking sporks up, dude, this made literally laugh out the fuck loud fuck fuck fuckity fuck.

        Gratuitous use of the word fuck, I lose 2 points. Bumfucker.

      • Bumfuck as in Bumfuck, Egypt? Is that the prize (trip)? Pack yer bags, we’re leaving in the morning! And I traded in our first class fucking tickets/amenities so that Zoe, Sass, Tessa, Blah (hope I didn’t leave any of us FUCKERS out,,,) can join our vacation!! Love the fuck outta yas!! ❀

      • Volatile Femmes on tour, Yesss…Love ya all as much as I love pegacorns and cursing!

      • Arrgh!!! Matey! Raise a cask o’ whiskey to us V. Femmes, get fall down sloppy cursing FUCKING drunk, ride the Pegacorns into town, pillage & loot. Bumfuck here we come!! Hahaha!!

      • I saw a sign on a Bacardi cooler that said, “If you drink rum before noon, it doesn’t make you an alcoholic. It makes you a pirate, matey!”
        I wanna be a pirate while on tour and bring new meaning to the term “pillage”.

      • YAY!! Let’s do it! I LIKE that slogan!!

      • My Mom says/said “I’m a lush. I’m not an alcoholic, I don’t go to the meetings” L’FUCKING’OL

      • Rehab is for quitters and I ain’t no quitter! I have too much blood in my alcohol system. My check liver function light will be coming on after this next drink…

        I love slogans like that. Too funny.

        On Sun, Jul 26, 2015 at 4:40 PM, Take a Ride on My Mood Swing wrote:

        >

      • My Daddy used to say that! πŸ™‚ he was in the US Army Reserves & used to donate blood, couple times he was actually turned down for that because drinking hard the night before. Miss him, goofy! (He was 14 yrs)

      • *He was 14 yrs sober, lol not years old,,,) HAHAHA!!

      • Thanks for the clarification, for a minute there it was starting to feel akin to my redneck family.

      • Hahaha!! Uncle Daddy!?! Fucking hilarious!!

      • It’s funny to an extent, but also confusing. The other day my 17 year old nephew referred to Spook at his cousin and I got all confused, thinking, no she’s your niece…No, he’s right, his cousin. Her uncle is my 20 year old half brother. And stepmom is two years younger than me yet people keep asking if she’s my birth mom.

        Loses its humor when you think about it, so I try to just make fun of it all. Like a Springer episode I just happen to be in the audience for taping πŸ˜‰

        On Sun, Jul 26, 2015 at 4:56 PM, Take a Ride on My Mood Swing wrote:

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      • My 7 y/o gson (Jayden) is 2nd cousin of my niece Gab.Another thing

      • Another weird thing (well he’s strange sooo,,,) my brother married his ex’s sister (not together anymore),,,

      • Wow, we should collaborate on a book called “Fifty Shades Of Redneck Mating Habits.”

        On Sun, Jul 26, 2015 at 5:05 PM, Take a Ride on My Mood Swing wrote:

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      • IKR, Telling ya!! But wait, there’s more,,, he’s got 5 kids (24-29 y/o) to 2 different women , ping ponged back & forth between them. 3 of them to the one woman were adopted out separately (the kids, reunited by social media) doesn’t do anything for his other 2,,,I could write an encyclopedia LOL,,,

      • Better put it on cocktail napkins with very small words so rednecks can read it πŸ˜‰

        On Sun, Jul 26, 2015 at 5:12 PM, Take a Ride on My Mood Swing wrote:

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  6. […] the end of the day, like Morgue said, I’m not forcing anyone to read my blog. You can find me in the tags, but it’s your […]

  7. It’s 7:28AM, no sleep, but medicated and failing eyelids. I have about a million feelings and just β€” you guys seriously save me every time you post so honestly. I swear to the dildos that words don’t suffice to express my gratitude for finding you. During this whole process seeing you, Sass, D, Blah, and Andi be sooooo honest and real; I was relieved. My whole life has been full of people who want to change me, baby me, invalidate me. I’m the screw up, the reason for their pain, and everything about me needs a makeover courtesy of therapy. These fuckers echoed all that shit that I was slowly peeling off my skin and you guys just help me mind the peeling process and not their bullshit.

    You’re my favorites, my lifelines. I swear I was crying when I read this because finally I’m not alone. You guys get me. We plan production of awesome merchandise. I bought a fucking spork because of you. I hung it on my door to remind me that I need it to go beyond the door, just like you. Like all of us who dump shit in the toilet and not rainbows. I’m gonna take it slow. I have to block these fuckers, change comment settings, and make lists.

    I’m also leaving Twitter. That place is more triggering than FB. I thought I could find more kindred minds there but nope. I should be fine once I put the filters on. No idea why I always attract asshole trolls. Must be because they think I’m easy due to my volatile temper. Fuckers.

    • I’ve been there, back before I tagged my blog properly. I got lots of hateful comments because I’d vent about having a new baby, the donor’s work schedule and lack of help when my meds would make me so sleepy…And these assholes would say shit like, “If you were my wife, I’d kill myself.”
      Ugh. Trolls need to fuck off.
      I’m glad you’re sticking with us, we all love you so much. Spork power! And filters, lots and lots of filters.
      ❀

  8. Hey Morgue, I am angry at my chiro, want to take his head off. He is one of those spewing rainbow shit and tells me sweet little lies. I am not better. My arm is killing me from the accident and the rest of me from the Fibromyalgia. The signs of anger scare me because that usually means I am either manic or depressed. I get angry in both moods. He’s sold me a crock of shit, but it if isn’t shit and I would be worse, I would have to kill myself because this pain is bad enough and he swears he is making me better. My cognitive skills are getting worse. I can’t speak right or write right. I leave out half the sentence. I reread it and go whoa, where’s the rest of it. I am going back to bed I just got back from Mr. Sunshine and ready to try and get some relief from no movement. Hey you all, hi from the sunny state of NJ. Hot!

    • Well, Dr Sunshine is now the Volatile Femmes Hitlist for the game of Manata. You get first dibs on whacking him with the stick and telling him his pain is imaginary πŸ˜‰ Feel better if you can!

      On Mon, Jul 27, 2015 at 11:05 AM, Take a Ride on My Mood Swing wrote:

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      • Me first? He won’t be scared. I can barely move LOL! Thanks for the well wishes and the understanding. I might be joining you guys and your fun times again. God I hope not. Life sucks bad enough.

      • Um…My brain is heat cooked but that sounds like an insult…It shouldn’t be because in spite of our dysfunction…Even the unstabilized faction of the VF has fuuuunnnn. It’s not illegal. It may, in fact, be healthy. Besides…You’re our designated sober person even if we irk you! ❀

        On Mon, Jul 27, 2015 at 9:27 PM, Take a Ride on My Mood Swing wrote:

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      • Wasn’t meant as insult. Though maybe it does sound that way on reread, but I meant joining you instead of spewing rainbows everywhere. Don’t listen to what I say today. I am not in a good place for conversation obviously. Alright designated driver. Oh wait I hate driving. It scares the shit out of me. How is that going to work? ❀

      • Yeah, I thought that, too. Sass is the driver then, she seems badass enough to leave a trail of flipped off vehicles in her wake even when she disobeys the rules! All hail Sass!

        On Mon, Jul 27, 2015 at 10:27 PM, Take a Ride on My Mood Swing wrote:

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      • I am for that “all hail Sass!!”

  9. itsjustlittleoldme Says:

    Wow. This was a really powerful post. I 100% agree with you. This person sounds like she’s helped a large group of people with her writing and she shouldn’t be made to leave that for the sake of some people hiding behind a screen. You have a very mature attitude. We can all agree to disagree and sometimes saying nothing is the right thing to do. I hope she carries on blogging. What is her blog? I think I’d like to have a read.
    C.x

  10. I fully agree. Like, post that shit if you want but your cute posts aren’t going to help anyone with mental issues. I have “friends” posting these statuses on facebook calling depression “totally normal”. Since when the fuck is wanting to throw yourself off a cliff normal?

    • Ya know, I used to think depression was just “my norm”. I was stunned to find out not everyone wanted to drink bleach on a daily basis.
      Sad that twenty years later, there are still those made to feel that way instead of being diagnosed properly.

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