Bipolarsaurus and Picnic Attacks

Yeah, I don’t have a classier title. It’s funny though. Next time panic strikes, I am just going to think of red checkered tablecloths and picnic baskets. Picnic attack. I wonder if it will help.


So I am still binge watching Nurse Jackie. And all this sobriety/sponsor talk has me wondering…
Why do people with mental illness not have a sponsor?
Ya know, someone we can call when things get really shitty and the darkness seeps in or the mania is knocking.
It would be super helpful to have a lifeline like that, maybe pull you back from the edge.
Not to compare addiction with mental illness, each are their own entity, but both are just as destructive to yourself and those around you. Heading off a self destructive manic episode or suicidal depression are just as worthy of support as someone not taking their next drink or pill or whatever.
So why not have a mental health “sponsor”?
Of course, that word would need to be replaced, I don’t like that word, it makes me think of high paid athletes and network TV. Sponsor this, idgets.
I don’t think it’s such a bad idea.
Especially if you’re in a situation like mine. Small town, little mental health education or support. Hell, the nearest NAMI meeting happens once a month fifty miles away and I can’t afford to drive that far.
Who do I call when I’m on that mental health ledge?
I have no one.
And there are so many of us in that same boat. Even those with a fully supportive system of family and friends reach a point where they’d really like to lean on someone who’s worn that particular pair of toe pinching pain inducing shoes called mental illness.

Once upon a time back when dinosaurs roamed the earth…Ok, it was the early 2000s when MSN had free chat rooms…I found this entire group of people who had depression, bipolar, borderline, panic, all the the classics…And we’d go into this virtual room with our internet handles and sometimes we’d talk seriously. Sometimes we’d all just snark around. And there were of course the one on one message chats.
It was a lifeline for many years. I loved that “room” and those people.

And then it all went to shit and Facebook destroyed everything and texting and Tweeting became the thing and not to sound like an old person…GET OFF MY LAWN. I want my support system back.
I have voiced this only to be met with, “No one wants to chat with a keyboard, they want face time.”
Yeah, Skype can bite me. I will never own an Apple product.
Besides, I hate video and loathe voice chat simply because my kid never stops talking and balancing that with ambient noise of neighbors having domestic disputes is too stressful. Typing puts me in control.
Egad, I sound like my dad promoted CB radios over all technology.

I know I can never go back, things change, progress, blah blah blah.

I still love the idea of creating a network, be it using a phone, text, IM, skype, two tin cans…so none of us ever have to face the dark periods on our own again. It’s not a cure but it’s a buoy in the water when you’re drowning.
I want that.
I want to be that for someone.
The professionals can only do so much. We can only do so much.
But if we were to stand together and lean on each other…We would be that much stronger and more likely not to regress.

Unfortunately, I’m just the idea girl, I know fuck all about follow through. If I did, I’d have done created “meal in a pill” and shut people up about “morbid obesity epidemic”.
That and the “cures stupid” supplement.
A ghoul can dream.

2 Responses to “Bipolarsaurus and Picnic Attacks”

  1. Agh! Picnic attack! Your entire blog totally cracked me up. I actually have a couple junkie siblings and whenever they were sober (or pretending to be – whatever), they would bring me to NA meetings occasionally. I was always so jealous that they had a whole group of people that gathered every week or so to support and understand each other. I wanted a sponsor. I wanted someone to tell me about their similar experiences and teach me how to deal with reality. I was so jealous, in fact, that when I learned that no such thing existed, I started brainstorming. Actually, I first decided that there’s no hope for me and my future involves a cabin in the woods with no human contact. But instead I decided that I’m probably not alone in my longing for assistance and that’s when I started brainstorming. Anyway, I hope one day to be of some sort of support to yours and many others’ needs. Thanks for sharing! Very enlightening! 😊

  2. Where I live there are live support groups for Mood Disorders. They keep a phone list that you can call someone to talk to and you can put your name on the list if you want to be able to help someone else. Do you have live supports groups of your peers anywhere near you. This is not Nami although I think they follow Namia guidelings.

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