Selective Ignorance

I still remember the day Robin Williams died. And R said, “He was so funny, he had everything to live for, why would he do something so stupid as to kill himself?”
Like depression wasn’t a “good enough” reason.
And I just marveled, How can someone be as intelligent as R and yet say something so asinine?
But maybe it’s more ignorance than anything. Unless your mind is open to empathizing (his is not on the mental health issue) you will view it as trivial.
Those who live it…It’s not trivial at all. It’s hard. It takes bravery and tenacity and more strength than anyone can fathom.
Depression kills. Maybe in the form of suicide but the mental illness is what drives you to it. Misfiring neurons or imbalanced chemicals put you in that dark place where you cannot escape. It tells you things are futile. That you are useless. That nothing will get better. And you fight it for awhile. Until it’s poisoned your entire system and you start to believe it, bit by bit.
Depression, and mental illness on a whole, does kill. It’s like being complicit in a murder if it happens during a robbery even if you didn’t pull the trigger. Depression is often complicit when someone takes their own life.
Until society wakes up and realizes this, it will just be more apathy or flat out disdain for the mentally ill and those who do eventually succumb in the form of suicide.
You cannot possibly grasp just how dark a mind has to be to get to that point. Mental illness is a cancer that metastasizes and spreads and sometimes…people just can’t beat it.

The selective ignorance the masses cling to, as if there’s no way to educate themselves thus making their (wrong)perception correct and acceptable…
Those are the demons we have to fight and they suck just as much as any mental illness demons.

Mental health is inexact in the science. It is difficult on all those involved. But the best way to cope, and be supportive, is to LEARN about the illness at hand. Once you recognize similar behaviors say, in borderline personality disorder or unipolar depression, you will figure out that it’s not personal. Your loved one is not trying to hurt you. It’s not that they don’t care or are selfish.
They have an illness.
Physical illness limits the body.
Mental illness limits the mind’s ability to perform optimally.
Ignorance is choice.

People need to choose to learn.
Because some of the most talented and brilliant minds over centuries have belonged to people with some sort of mental issue and if you dismiss someone for this without regard to how amazing they are…
You may be helping to stamp out the spirit of the next great writer or artist or the guy who cures cancer.
You don’t abandon someone with diabetes or cancer. You learn, you help, you support.
Those with mental illness only ask for the same.

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20 Responses to “Selective Ignorance”

  1. People just don’t seem to get it unless they’ve got it.

    • That’s kind of my whole mentality on every issue. I don’t have a penis, I won’t tell men it’s wrong to take Viagra just to have an orgasm. Just the same, if you don’t have a uterus, stay out of my reproductive rights. It really is, on every level, a matter of “Unless you’ve been there…Shut the fuck up.”
      But people who truly care will be bothered to learn. I did for my ex husband who had a genetic condition. I wanted to be knowledgeable on how to help him.
      It’s a shame mental illness isn’t viewed the same.

  2. I soooooo needed this RIGHT NOW. Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU. ❤

    • Glad to hear it, I worked on that one for three days and almost scrapped it…Then I thought, may as well post it. Knowing it resonated with you at a time you needed it…Makes it all worthwhile.

      • I pretty much publish everything. Only have i think 2 drafts saved over almost a year. Even when i think its crap, someone else will its not. Thanks again-its great

  3. I totally understand & ‘get it’. I agree, I attempted suicide (4 times if memory is correct) one time very very close to success,,, at NO time did I contemplate it to ‘get even’with anyone, or ‘see how bad they feel,,,’ I did it so I would be done with the pain, the torture, agony, I was so very tired of suffering,,, (my family loved me, I love my daughter & grandson to the end of the world & back) I just couldn’t take anymore. I still have suicidal ideations, intrusive thoughts. I will not act upon them because of my family & because I’m medicated.

    • I think much like me, you have that caregiver gene. As long as I have always had a cat (now a kid) counting on me…I’ve avoided carrying through on any suicidal ideations. I may be miserable and want to die but knowing I have to hold on for that one reason…It’s kept me alive. Maybe not happy but alive. Some days that’s all we’ve got.

  4. Reblogged this on SassaFrass, The Feisty and commented:
    Just dealt with this today…sigh

  5. I think you’re right about that caregiver gene,,,

  6. Very very well said. Suicide kills far more people than AIDS. But do we give those that suffer from this the type of hell any where near financial support. Hell no. We do not want to talk about suicide. But we will talk and support just about anything else.

    The bottom line is that this culture sucks. The society is all about immediate gratification. The pharmaceutical companies sell silver bullets. Yes, we are the only country that is allowed to have pharmaceutical companies market their shit directlly to the public. With that said, I am not saying that drugs should not be part of the equation. But, many just want to open up without being judged or labeled.

    • I’ve done several posts critiquing big pharma. I think “prozac nation” in the 80’s resulted in a large amount of people with a couple weeks of “the blues” getting labeled as mentally ill. A few weeks is supercilious compared to people who suffer for months or years. A pill doesn’t cure all but for those who have a legitimate mental illness…Big pharma is a necessary evil. I’ve tried the “anti meds” route and it was an epic fail thus confirming…I am not going through some fleeting phase. Most of us NEED the big pharma corporations.
      Sad but true.

      • Yes, they are an necessary evil. When SSRI;s were introduced, they were done with great fanfare. The reality is that what we don’t know is more than what we do know. When everyone is unique, using a reductionistic thought that a pill will work is pretty naive thinking. But, so many are so desparate for immediate relief. I know from what you speak. It is unfortunate.

  7. As far as Robin Williams go, I heard that he was suffering from Parkinson’s Disease and didn’t want to put his family through that. My mom had it and it was difficult to watch her suffer and then the dementia sets in. We lost her 10/5/13.

    • Perhaps but the pain his death caused anyway…Seems to be the distorted logic of someone with an illness who is also depressed. It’s not a logic I can’t empathize with, though.

    • Sometimes our logic is distorted. I don’t trust my logic most of the time.

      • My rule of thumb when I feel illogical and don’t know if it’s related to some mood or anxiety thing…I mull whatever is setting me off for a day or so. If it’s still lurking after that, I consider it a logical issue. If I’ve already forgotten what I was so upset about…Well, distorted thought thwarted. Life is harder when you have to second guess yourself at every turn.

        On Sun, Apr 12, 2015 at 7:48 AM, Take a Ride on My Mood Swing wrote:

        >

      • I do a lot of mulling. It helps to keep me out of trouble. Sometimes I leap to conclusions and go off in a huff or throw a fit. Most times after mulling it over I decide it wasn’t so important anyhow.

  8. Reblogged this on Tessa Can Do IT! and commented:
    A must read article!

  9. alfgarnet Says:

    Great words take care stay safe

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