Mood Spikes

Migraine subsided today, felt half ass functional albeit irritable with no discernible reason to be.
The bad thoughts that accompany an abrupt low cycle are returning. People are taking advantage of you…You’re giving way more than you get in return…
It does sound a little borderline.
Though I’ve read nothing about borderline personality traits emerging only as a precursor to depressions, which is when this line of thought begins to occur.

And the mood spikes…Wow. One minute, I am fine, the next I feel furious for no good reason because ten minutes later, it has passed and I feel like I have whiplash because I can’t explain it. The only facsimile is when I was pregnant and flooded with the nutsy kookoo hormones.

There are days I hate my life because it’s so up and down, there is no norm, no happy mediums. Yet a couple of months ago, I was doing very well. Surely personality isn’t that fleeting, especially without outside catalysts. If it is, then I am beyond redemption.
Which I refuse to believe. No matter what some doctor and their diagnostic manual say.

Mood crashed.

I’m like Icarus. When I am up, I fly close to the sun.
And inevitably get burned.
But, like a phoenix I rise out of the ashes that are myself.

This whole disorder is an epic bucket 0f fail.
People want to prove how far they are willing to go and how hardcore they are…screw the ice bucket challenge.
They should take the bipolar bucket challenge.

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One Response to “Mood Spikes”

  1. You should totally install some kinda device that warns you when you are too close to the sun. Why do you think when I see you are up, I tell you to sit down and stop doing stuff. Cause you make the place look untidy :p

    Brain reboot time. With all these updates and reboots, I swear it’s like we are running Norton. Cause it does sweet fuck all to keep the depression and anxiety at bay.

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