The anxiety monster

Whoever said the more you do something that unnerves you the easier it will get hadn’t met me.

We were invited to R’s by his wife, an olive branch in light of my sucky week.

Well, I’ve been there dozens of times and yet my anxiety is skyrocketing in spite of xanax.

It could also be the six kids running like banshees through my home heightening it.

 

I just don’t understand anxiety.

My mood has been downish  but not horrible. At this point it’s just like what is new, life fucking sucks and people suck. And the shit I take for being “pessimistic” when I am just being realistic makes me furious. I have had enough bad shit happen to me to realistically face the fact that shit does happen. Pardon me if I can’t work myself into an optimistic frenzy about it. If that’s negative, so be it.

Now. To paste on the mask of civility and go make nice.

It’s harder than it sounds, trust me.

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